The Blinding Light
by Siaram
Summary: I can be with you always, whether you're near or far, for I have roads inside me that take me where you are. Written for the Trory summer fic exchanged.


**_Disclaimers: _**I don't have any rights in Gilmore girls... I'm living in my own fantasy world.

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**Author's Note: **This is the result of my assignment from The Trory Summer Fic exchange. Thanks to **Jewls13** for betaing this fic for me. I decided to add to this author note, since I received many confused reviews. This story is set two years after the season 4 final. As for this ending, all the clues are present but will be more explained in my sequel that will be posted soon, "It Doesn't Matter".

**Didi** _  
  
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**The Blinding Light**

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Rory looked at her surroundings, trying to find a familiar face in the mist of socialites attending her grandparent's fortieth wedding anniversary. Only a month ago had she finished her finals, leaving her the entire summer to relax before beginning her last year in Yale. As she looked at Emily's happy eyes, memories flowed in her mind. Remembering how hard she and Lorelai worked through their own problems to team up together to plan a way to make her grandparents realize that they were meant to be together.

Her thoughts interrupted by the slightly inebriated voice of Richard Gilmore, his arms sliding around her slim shoulders.

"Rory! I want you to meet this old friend of mine."

Swiftly, Rory forced a smile on her delicate features, to look at the man standing in front of her. Vivid steel blue eyes captivated her instantly, eyes too young and playful for a man in his sixties. As Rory registered the silver hair and a very familiar smirk.

"Janlan, I would like you to meet my granddaughter, Rory. Rory, this is Janlan DuGrey." A sign from Emily motioning Richard to join her, made Richard add, "I'll be right back."

Rory extended her hand, "It's a pleasure to meet you, sir."

Janlan accepted Rory's offered hand, shaking it with an iron grip that left Rory trying to hide her surprise that this elder man is still very strong.

"The pleasure is all mine believe me. I've heard a great deal about you young lady."

Rory smiled, "I'm sure that my grandfather over exaggerated."

"No, from what my grandson told me about you."

Before Rory had the chance to inquire on his comment, a familiar voice was heard behind her, "You were talking about me grandpa?"

Upon hearing the voice, Rory blushed while turning around and seeing those oceanic blue eyes that have haunted some of her dreams; she smiled happily, "Tristan!"

A smirk on his lips, Tristan asked softly, "Missed me, Mary?"

Trying to find a comeback, Rory blanked and instead chose to do the only thing that come to her mind. She hugged him.

At lost of words, Tristan returned the embrace, still not believing that Rory Gilmore was hugging him willingly, he glanced at his grandfather questioningly.

Janlan smirked at his grandson and cleared his throat,

"I'll let you kids get reacquainted."

As he walked away, he exchanged a wink with Richard, both men grinning contentedly. Emily smiled brightly as she and Richard watched Rory and Tristan's reunion even if surprised by Rory's unusual behavior.

After a couple of minutes of holding Tristan, Rory took a step back, breaking the contact much to Tristan displeasure. Tristan placed Rory's hand in his, whispering.

"Do you want to go for a walk?"

Rory hesitated before replying joyfully, "Sure!"

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Rory and Tristan walked in the rose's garden for at least ten minutes without exchanging words. Coming to a bench, Tristan sat down and pulled on Rory's hand to make her follow his motion. Resting their tangled hands on the backrest of the bench, Tristan shifted his position, putting one foot between them to face Rory as she remained staring at the floor, hit by a wave of shyness.

Tristan gave Rory a light squeeze on her hand, making Rory look at him with confusion in her eyes. His eyes taking the liberty to notice the transformations that happened over her features since that fateful night he was sent away. Her hair was shorter than in high school, giving her a more mature look. Her eyes were still as vividly azure as before. He noticed that she lost weight, not that she needed to lose some in the first place, but it made her look more graceful and refining her beautifully.

Uncomfortable in front of her ex-schoolmate, Rory noticed the way his shoulders broadened, the tiny laugh lines surrounding his mouth and eyes that weren't there before, the way his eyes seemed more serious than before. His famous blond tousled hair shorter and a little darker.

Tristan noticed that she was doing the exact same thing he was doing, analyzing every little physical change. Looking deeply into her eyes, a smirk appeared on his full lips.

"Checking me out?"

With her cheeks burning, Rory replied, "I was only returning the favor."

Tristan inched closer, "Like what you see?"

Rory hesitated for a second before she playfully inched closer.

"I'd need to see more to make up my mind. What about you?"

With a suggestive raise of the eyebrows, in a soft voice he replied, "I like what I'm seeing so far, and I'm willing to accommodate any of your exploratory needs."

Straightening herself to place distance between their very close faces, she changed the subject ignoring his previous comment, "How long have you been back in Hartford?"

Tristan smirked, "A little over three years."

"I hadn't heard."

Shifting his position again, Tristan leaned back on the bench and looked at the roses, "Trying to keep a low profile. Different crowd." He shrugged, "After military school, I didn't feel like getting busted again. Made new friends and everything. I would have come to visit you but I figured you were in Harvard and wouldn't care anyway."

Rory faced the garden in front of her where a small white rabbit ran to hide into the bushes. Inhaling deeply, she realized just how beautiful the night was. Not too hot, not cold, just perfect. She moved slightly to rest her neck over the backrest of the seat and watched the sky. Perfect night, sky filled with stars and the moon was shinning brightly, a soft breeze playing softly with her hair.

"I went to Yale." she paused, "and I wouldn't have minded a surprise visit."

Tristan shifted his position once more to imitate Rory's, "Funny, I haven't seen you in Yale. That's where I go."

Rory turned her head to look at Tristan's profile, "It's a big campus and I've never been part of the 'in' crowd."

"I live off campus. I'm there only for classes. I saw Paris once but she avoided me."

"We're rooming together, she never mentioned seeing you."

Tristan chuckled and looked at her, "What a nightmare it must be!"

"Actually, she's neurotic and completely crazy but I can say that we are very good friends now."

"Wow! I never thought I'd see the day."

Tristan's head was suddenly facing Rory's. He looked into her eyes, inching closer to her. She felt a sense of 'déjà vu' but ignored it. Tristan's lips touched Rory's softly, creating butterflies in both of their stomachs when,

"Rory! Where are you? We need to go, Luke is about to rip his tie off. And you know that attending a Gilmore party without a tie or leaving a party without a tie for that matter, is completely unacceptable for Emily Gilmore." Lorelai called out, mocking her mother.

Rory rose from her position, readjusting her dress, she smiled at Tristan whispering a 'thank you' before running off to meet her mom.

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Walking out of the house, Rory looked at the backyard noticing how tall the grass was and that she should probably cut it soon. Shaking her head, Rory dismissed the idea as she walked around the house to sit on the swinging bench on the porch. Resting her feet on the seat facing her, she closed her eyes, touching her lips with her fingertips, mentally swearing at her mom's bad timing.

She looked over at Babette's house, a giant dollhouse surrounded by ceramic gnomes. A small flash of white moving between the gnomes followed closely by a flash of orange captivated her attention. Recognizing the new 'butterscotch' of her neighbor, she tried figuring out what the cat has been chasing but the pair had already disappeared from her sight.

Contemplating the stars for the second time that night, she wished to be able to get away from that town, where everything was too quiet and repetitive, even if just for a couple of days. She considered her options briefly before coming to the realization that she had none. Lorelai had to work extra hours at the Dragonfly since Sookie was on a well-deserved vacation with Jackson; and Michel was currently recuperating from his operation that has successfully changed him into a Michelle. Lane was out the question since she and Zach were in the process of planning their wedding-which meant Lane had to oversee everything. Paris was… well Rory really did deserve a break from her she decided.

Sighing in frustration, Rory closed her eyes once again, she heard footsteps coming toward her, but she didn't bother to turn around. Feeling the presence of someone sitting in front of her, she opened her eyes,

"Tristan" she whispered, as she shyly smiled. But it quickly faded when she watched his lips curl into a smirk and his eyes fill with lust and wanting. She sat up straight, her feet dropping on the floor.

"What are you doing here?"

Tristan stood up, offering Rory a hand to help her stand up. Hesitantly, she accepted the offered hand with questioning eyes.

"You left just when things were getting interesting."

Butterflies of excitement coursed inside her stomach, "So, you followed me home?"

With Tristan's right hand still holding Rory's left one, he slid his left arm around her slim waist, bringing her closer to him at the same time. Trying to look unaffected, Rory looked into Tristan's eyes to realize that his face was very close to hers. Anticipation of his next move in her eyes, Rory unconsciously licked her lower lip.

Tristan dropped Rory's hand to place his own behind Rory's neck, forcing her face to get closer to his. Panicking, Rory asked, "Shouldn't we talk first?"

Leaning to kiss her lips tenderly, Tristan breathed out, "What do you want to talk about?"

"Um…" Rory stuttered out, shocked and confused, "we could talk about what happened..." A feather kiss on the side of her mouth, "… I was trying to say…" Tristan moved his lips to her chin, "…what…" Tristan's lips going down her neck, "… Urggg! Stop!"

Tristan separated his lips from her face to look intensely into her eyes. "Why?"

Distressed, Rory tried to find a good reason for her objections, "We… err… haven't seen each other for over four years."

Tristan tangled both of his hand behind her, bringing her even closer, "We'll have plenty of time to talk later."

Tristan's lips touched hers, this time forcefully, trying to prevent her from objecting some more. Licking and biting her bottom lip in hope to get access to her mouth, he sighed in relief as he felt her weakening. Pushing Rory's back up against the wall, he invaded her mouth hungrily, leaving her no room to escape.

Feeling his tongue exploring her mouth, Rory felt the protective walls surrounding her crumble into pieces. Her arms holding him tightly, she returned the kiss feverishly while Tristan's hand began to explore more of her body.

Tristan left her mouth to move down to her neck, trailing open mouth kisses up to her ear, sucking on her earlobe softly. His heart flipped in his chest as he heard the soft moans escaping her lips. His hands taking hold of hers, he raised them over her head securing them with one hand only while the other was playing softly with her hair. Looking at her intensely, he murmured, "God you're beautiful."

Rory's heart melted upon hearing the adoration in Tristan's voice. Her legs barely holding her shivering body as Tristan kisses lowered down her collarbones. Deciding to be the one to take control for once in her life, she used her elbows to push him away. Upon seeing his confused look, Rory restrained from smiling. Tristan let go of her hands, uncertain of what he might have done wrong when he felt his body turned then pushed against the wall.

Rory attacked his mouth, feeling Tristan surrendering to her ministrations, Rory decided to be bolder and to attack the buttons of his dressed shirt still kissing his mouth. Tristan groaned as he pulled her and whispered in her ear, "Does that mean that you are inviting me in?"

Rory took a step back and as she processed the implications of his question, she stammered, "I… that's maybe… not a good idea."

Tristan brought her close to him again, lifting her shirt just enough to slide his hands under it.

"Why isn't it if I may ask?" One of his hand following invisible circles on her shoulder blades while the other one rested comfortably on her lower back.

Rory gave into his embrace, savoring the moment, this moment that she's been secretly hoping for ever since his departure during junior year. Rory wrapped her arms around his neck, pressing her body against his. She kissed his lips tenderly and whispered,

"Firstly, because my mom," her tongue traced a line over his lower lip, "is still awake."

Her tongue began to do the same thing on his upper lip but she moved her face away just in time not to be kissed. Rory heard a muttered 'tease' escaping Tristan's lips forcing her to continue what she had to say.

"Secondly, I'm afraid that if I let you in, you'll leave me again tomorrow."

Tristan held Rory more tightly after hearing her confession, kissing the top of her head, an idea suddenly forming inside his mind. "Let's just leave."

Rory broke the embrace, confused by his sudden change of subject, "What? Where?"

A genuine smile formed on his lips as he bent to kiss her tenderly, "I want us to get away?"

"Why?"

"To be together. We'll drive until we find a place we like to stop by, no worries, no pressure. Just you and me. Together."

Deciding to act on instinct, Rory smiled brightly, "Give me five minutes, time to pack and tell my mom."

Tristan prevented her from going inside by holding her arm strongly. "No, call your mom once we're gone. We'll buy everything we need on the road."

Giving one last glance at the house, she saw Lorelai and Luke moving towards a passionate embrace. Deciding that it wasn't the good time to tell Lorelai about her leaving, she turned to Tristan.

"What are we waiting for then?"

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They drove for a couple of hours stopping only to buy coffee and things that they needed for the night. They stopped at a little dinner to eat something only to jump back in Tristan's convertible Porsche. As the wind blew in their hair, they contemplated the road ahead of them silently, enjoying each other's company. Occasionally finding excuses to touch and steal glances at each other.

Tristan turned to take a road hidden by the trees. As Tristan drove on the dirt road that lead them further into the forest, Rory stayed quiet, preferring to be surprised with their destination than to ask about it. Resting comfortably on her seat, her eyelids heavier by the minute, Rory fought against sleep. Seeing her yawn, Tristan squeezed her hand.

"We'll be there in a minute or two."

Rory nodded a sleepy smile over her lips. As Tristan stopped the engine, Rory gasped at the sight in front of her. Alone in the middle of the trees, a house was standing. A wooden porch welcoming them to enter.

"Wow!" Rory exclaimed, "this house is beautiful, how did you find it?"

Tristan climbed out the car, "I didn't, it found me. My grandfather gave it to me a couple of years ago." Walking to her side of the car, he gallantly opened her door.

"It used to be his hidden retreat place." He offered Rory a hand to help her climb out. "But now, he prefers to go to a five stars hotel."

Rory took the offered hand, "It's beautiful. Here in the middle of nowhere, no noisy neighbor, no one to disturb us."

Helping her out of car, he closed the door, moved to the back of the car to open his trunk. "No phone, no TV, no electricity, nothing." Taking a cooler out, Tristan closed the trunk.

Rory walked beside him, making their way to the door. "Wow, it feels as if it's from another century."

Tristan opened the door, letting Rory precede him. "We are currently in the living room."

Rory looked around the room quickly, thinking the words 'living room' never been more appropriate. A fireplace in the corner of the room, thousand of books placed in shelves that are covering most of the walls, oil lamps waiting to be used in corners and on tables. A marble chessboard with an unfinished game placed on a small wooden table near a window.

Tristan led her into another room, "this is the kitchen."

Instead of a regular sink, there was a water pump over a big basin, marble counter on one side, a massive wooden table in the middle of the room ready to receive ten to twelve people to eat. Tristan placed the cooler on the table, walking to another door. Opening it, he said in a husky voice while looking at Rory with hungry eyes for her, "This is the bedroom."

Instantly, Rory blushed and dropped her gaze to the floor, imagining all the things they could be doing inside the room. Tristan walked back to her, surrounding his arms around her thin shape. "Are you tired? Do you want to go to sleep? Or we could take a midnight bath in the lake."

Rory looked at Tristan intensely, a burning fire of passion warming her. "It's well," she glanced at her watch, "past midnight…"

Her words were lost as Tristan's lips covered hers, "I want you Rory and I know you want me too." His tongue forcing a way inside her mouth, he kissed her with all his might.

Rory finally returned the kiss, holding on to him, craving for him to make her his. Her hands going down on his back, she murmured, "You right, I want you. End this madness Tristan and make love to me."

Tristan broke the embrace, smirking, "I knew you couldn't resist me."

Defeated, Rory looked at him with a look filled with hurting. "Was all this just a game to you?"

Tristan's smirk disappeared instantly, "No, I want you and I want to do countless things to your body." He said before breaking eye contact, a faint blush over his cheek, "But you're different and I… I can't believe I'm going to say this out laud." Looking intensely in her eyes, "I want us to wait."

Rory's mouth dropped open.

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Sitting comfortably over a blanket on the private beach by the lake behind the cabin, Rory watched Tristan building up the fire. The trees hid the beach, the lake and the cabin to the whole world, allowing this place untouched by man and time. A wolf crying out at the moon made birds fly away in formation, as a single white rabbit come out from behind the trees and hopped right pass Rory's feet.

The fire burning, Tristan joined Rory on the blanket. For a while, they sat silently admiring the reflection of the moon over the lake.

"This place is so peaceful and surreal. I feel as if I fell in a hole bringing me to a completely different dimension. A place out of time."

Tristan laid down on his back, patting his right shoulder to invite Rory to use it as a pillow. "I know what you mean, when life becomes too hectic, I escape here."

"I wish I had that." Rory said wistfully.

"You do." Tristan said knowingly.

A moment of silence followed as Rory snuggled close to him, her head on his shoulder, one leg over his, her right hand caressing his chest over the thin fabric of his shirt.

"Good escaping place." She sighed, moved her head to look at him, "I'm starving."

Tristan smiled at her, "Me too. I'm just too lazy to go grab the cooler inside."

She left an openmouthed kiss over his throat, "How about…" teasing him by biting his neck softly, "I keep on biting you?"

Swiftly, Tristan moved her on her back, pinning her to the ground. One of his hands holding both of her wrists over her head, his body maintaining her legs steadily.

"How about I get to be the torturer?"

Rory felt excited to be in this vulnerable position, "Going back to your old ways, DuGrey?"

Smirking, he traced a line following her collarbones with his finger.

"If that's what it takes for you to love me, I will." He said passing his hand between her breasts.

Rory gasped under his hand, wanting to be touched rather than teased. A warm feeling filled her heart as she came to the realization that Tristan really did change. Old Tristan wouldn't have waited, he would have taken any open opportunity. But was it because she didn't really know him back then? Was it just an act then or an act right now? Breaking easily free from his hold, she walked back to the cabin, leaving Tristan puzzled and alone in front of the fire.

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Captivated by the flames, Tristan wondering where things went wrong. Would she come back? Looking at his watch, he decided to wait a little while longer before going after her.

Rory watched Tristan from afar with the cooler in her hands, seeing how concentrated he looked; she walked to him quietly, afraid to break his concentration. She sat beside him. After a minute she spoke.

"I just realized that I didn't really know you."

"Why would you say that?" Tristan's gaze never left the fire.

"Because back then, you were a jerk one moment and then this really nice person the next. I don't know who you were and I don't know who you are now. So which are you? The nice guy or the jerk?"

"A little bit of both, I guess." Finally resting his eyes on her, "But being here with you makes me want to be better. Still want to eat?"

"Yes."

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Wrapped in a blanket, Rory sat between Tristan's legs watching the fire. Beside them lay empty plastic containers and a half empty red wine bottle beside two plastic glasses. Holding Rory in his arms, Tristan finally spoke, "If you would only know how long I've waited for this..."

Resting her head against his chest, Rory asked, "How long?"

"Since I said goodbye."

Looking at the fire, Rory whispered, "I love you."

"I love me too, but I love you more."

Slowly, they laid down, still watching the flame of the fire. As the color of the sky slightly changed from black to deep blue, they closed their eyes and drifted into a peaceful rest.

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Feeling light teasing her closed eyes, Rory opens them to see a streaming bright light invade the darkness of the room through a small hole in the dirty curtains. She gazes at the room, her half asleep mind registering her surrounding unconsciously. The ripped and greasy curtains hide a crack on the dirty window, a single chair covering tears in the fabric trying to keep in the coarse stuffing from falling out. A small rusting silver and white table sitting above, the decaying carpet with an all but faded pattern on it. Yellowed walls that have been tainted by cigarette smoke. The small TV that sits on the big drawer. The night stands holding an old bible inside next to an out of ink pen. An old bed with rough faded sheets that probably haven't been washed in a while.

A metallic flash draws her attention to the opposite side of the bed. His wedding band lay on top of a faded old bible on the nightstand. She looks at her bare fingers, and then at the incredibly tall man sleeping peacefully next to her, covered only by a sheet. The man she has been seeing for the last two years, ever since that night, when her life changed completely. The man she once used to love, the man that has been her first for everything. Every time, he takes his ring off, with empty promises of loving only her and reaffirming that things aren't working between his sweat wife and him. Another time, another place, she might have cried. But not now, not anymore, she knows better. She rises from the bed, her eyes dry and emotionless. A familiar sick feeling in her stomach as she disgust herself for being there again. Before heading into the cheap motel bathroom, she takes another look around the room and prays for the night to come quickly, because it's only then that her dreams brighten her life.


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